The Pride Game

The Pride Game

                Although I am not married, I did experience many “pride games” in the companionships I had while on my mission in Guatemala. Now, I think that having a companion on your mission and being married are two different things. I think that having mission companions does help prepare you to be patient and loving- but, I think that having a companion on a mission is hard because you are literally with them twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. I don’t think people are with their spouses for that amount of time. We have jobs and different responsibilities in the church and so forth. Needless to say- I think having a mission companion is much harder!

            When we would get annoyed or frustrated with each other we would do many of the pride games mentioned in the assignment. Pride games such as ignoring one another, blaming each other, attack, scorekeeping, refusal to apologize first, refusal to forgive, bringing up faults in one another, holding grudges, silent treatment, gossiping about your companion to others, attitude of entitlement, stubbornness to change, selfishness, unwillingness to learn from companion, fault finding, and withholding love and affection.

            When I first began my mission, I have to admit that I was very selfish and very prideful (I’m still working on being more selfless and humble). My first three companions were so hard! I think part of it had to do with that we were all knew to the mission. My trainer had just finished her training, then I trained, then I received a companion that had just finished her training. I had the hardest time getting along with them! To be honest, I experienced every one of the pride games mentioned in the previous paragraph. Perhaps they were playing the pride game on me, but I know that I was playing it on them. I thought I was better than my companions. I thought that I knew everything and that they didn’t know anything. I was bossy and controlling and would get easily frustrated or angry with them. We argued all of the time and we didn’t have the spirit with us. Between those three companions we had seven baptisms which was an incredibly low number for six transfers.

            Well, my life changed when I was called to serve as a trainer again. I was so nervous just because I really didn’t get along with my first trainee. This new companions name was Sister Arellano. She changed my life! I honestly feel bad for how I treated her sometimes because she was the most humble and loving person you could ever meet. She was always trying to be better. I would tell her she was doing something wrong and she’d fix it without getting frustrated or defensive. Honestly, that made me even more mad because I knew that she was more Christ like than I was. I wasn’t training her, she was training me. I learned a lot in those three transfers and I grew to love her more than anyone one else. She taught me to love and serve not with her words, but with her actions. We got along so well that we baptized twenty-four people together in three transfers!  

            I think the best thing to do would be to teach your spouse by your example. If you have something negative to say, don’t you dare say it! I think the more we cling to the Gospel of Jesus Christ the more likely our marriages will last. I know that the Lord will bless us with the spirit when we do our best to follow the Lord’s command in every aspect of our lives. The Lord loves us so much and he wants us to be happy in our families. I think doing random acts of service is another way to show your love for one another. Even doing chores around the house is a huge sign of respect and love. When we put our best effort out there, our spouse will be inclined to do the same.