Blessed is the home where each puts the others happiness first.
According to John Gottman, 69 percent of marriage are perpetual. I would have to agree with his statement. I believe that most marital problems are perpetual because both partners are too stubborn to let go of their pride. I have found that change is possible underneath any circumstances. Living in Guatemala for a year and a half, I learned a lot about change. When I arrived to Guatemala, I was prideful and irritable. My way or the highway. Unfortunately, these characteristics did not work to my benefit. My first three companions were really tough to deal with (I am sure that I was even more tough to deal with!); However, over time I began to change as I put my faith and trust into the Lord. I began to pray for strength to help me become the person that He would have me be. I tried really hard to listen to the spirit so I could know what I should do in the moment I should do it.
This became very helpful and dear to my heart. Before when a problem would arise in or out of my companionship, I would blame my companion and then we would both be angry and the spirit would not be with us. When I began to trust more in the Lord and have faith in Him everything changed. I was more willing to ask Him what we should do rather than complain about all of the lessons that would fall through or be mad at my companion and not talk to her for whatever reason. Instead, I began to be diligent in trying to be like my Savior, Jesus Christ.
I think the biggest way we can consecrate our marriages is by serving and loving our spouses no matter what. I really enjoyed a section in John Gottman's book. He talked about a woman whose in-laws would be coming to visit. Her husband and her decided to plan a dinner at one of their favorite restaurants to show them what they like to do on a typical weekend. This woman called to make reservations and was excited to take them out. Often times this women felt superior to her mother-in-law and her husband knew of this insecurity. When her and her husband were coming back from running an errand, they opened the door of their house only to smell a large gourmet meal that her husbands mom had made. This woman didn't say anything- but, her husband could tell she was a little bit upset by the look on her face. The husband politely told his mother that they would put the food in the fridge and go enjoy their dinner at the restaurant where they had previously made their reservations. The mother-in-law was upset, but the husband did the right thing by standing up for his wife.
The scriptures command men to cleave unto their wives and for woman to cleave unto their husbands. I believe that this means in every aspect of our lives. God comes first, then our spouse, then everything else. Not in any other order. I think husbands are the initiators of the cleaving. After all, we women are suppose to listen to the counsel of our husbands as they listen to the Lord's. Women, however, can have a powerful impact on our husbands. I believe that when we put forth our best efforts to strengthen our relationships with the Lord and our husbands, they will see our example and strive to be better.
I find the most attractive thing about a man is his willingness to help. How cool would it be if your husband did the dishes after dinner every night (Or even better you do them together!), or him cooking a meal every once in a while, or him getting up in the middle of the night to take care of the baby for once etc. The more we serve our spouses, the more we grow to love and appreciate them.
I think that a big part of consecrating your marriage would include the habit of daily pray and scripture study as a couple. When we sacrifice our time to the Lord, He will bless us. The scriptures and prayer are no doubt the best ways to strengthen your marriage.
I am grateful for the Prophet and his Apostles. I am grateful for the guidance and counsel they share with us to strengthen our homes and families. I know that if we follow their words and examples, we will become a stronger and happier family! Centered upon the gospel of Jesus Christ!
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